Monday, October 25, 2010

Of Desert Love..

She knew the moment she set her eyes on him. She knew the moment, he stared back at her, past her. She simply knew.

>>>
The Desert Men

It wasn't a deserted day. There was a lot of activity in the kafila. Nomads too, have a particular life. And the desert, knows it well!

Veiled, unhurried, she walked past them. At times with a pitcher full of water. At times, with the pitcher, empty. At times, emptying her pitcher to quench a traveler's thirst, and watch his eyes, come alive, a rebirth of sorts. She knew, what water meant. The men revelled at it. She...she simply knew.

At times, she just walked past them...just to wander. 

They all watched her, from the caves of their own mind. Each a different colour. Each a different shade. Each a certain darkness. They watched her unhurried gait. Her colourful wear clothing her dark, desert tanned, but shimmering skin. They could somehow always hear that lil' jingle that hung at her waist from her skirt, dangling as she walked past. Their eyes naturally caught in its movement, and so too, their breath. As if her entire being was centered in that dangling bit of robe. And her footsteps jz fell, not to carry her, but that lil' jingle on her waist.

And as their eyes travelled, along the jingle and the pitcher that she carried at her waist, up her slender neck...and then the veil...they suddenly found themselves wishing, if only there was a certain veil made, to stop her from boring her eyes back at them... 

Almost immediately, their eyes faltered, but they could see that her steps never did. They fell into perfect footsteps, and suddenly they couldn't decide if it was the desert that was scorching or did her feet, the desert? 
>>>
The Desert Damsel

She walked past them, in no more than a few moments, and yet they felt her gaze for long after. She observed each one, but knew that none, was the home where her heart was. She simply walked past. With her pitcher. Stopping to help an occasional traveler, nodding mutely, as he lived a moment in death, and felt he could die  for a bit of life, that the water in her pitcher revoked.
That evening though, an Arab entered her Kafila.
>>>
The Moment

He was fair. He had traveled for long, she could tell by his robes, the way the gravel was almost engrained into the cotton that draped him. She knew he'd be thirsty. But he showed no signs of it. She watched him descend.. seeking mutely, time and rest, at her kafila. And as he looked at her, in a proper moment of time, she knew.. who he was. And that, he wouldn't...

The Desert had always told her, that she must love the sand, for men only rose from its gravel. The gravel lured them, lead them, chose them, directed them...and finally, survived and willed them. She recognised him by that gravel.

"The Moment' arrived. She saw the gravel swirl. She heard the desert whisper, the tale of love, that would be hers...and knew in that instant, that he wouldn't...

For in that 'moment' that the desert rose, to swirl the gravel on him and her, he had stared past her. She almost laughed. What was he thinking? He didn't seem to know 'the moment'. The stars usually didn't shine this bright.  The winds, never this gentle. Their roar never so meaningful. But she watched him. And she knew the tale was hers. And his' to never know!
>>>
The Kafila

The kafila always welcomed travelers. It was a way of life. Never completely trusting the stranger, but serving him nevertheless, to learn to trust. Learn to live with it. Learn to lose it. And move on.

As days passed, the men in her kafila watched her. Carrying her pitcher, as ever. But they knew better, that she was carrying the winds of change in her heart. There was an air of certainty that she carried now. Of turmoil and acceptance. A desert tale, finally hers. A time ripe, to begin her story.

How did they know? They knew, for she didn't hide it. She simply walked past them, as she did every day, with a pitcher at her waist. She hid nothing, nor the tale, and the men that sensed it, she left them like ever, with a wish, there was indeed a veil.

She alone knew though, what could robe her. And where she could steal it from.
>>>
The Arab

He had arrived on a fateful night. He knew, his fate depended on it. For it was the longest journey the young man had ever taken, and yet, he wasn't finished. His Oasis lay farther still. He had left a great deal of treasure behind, and he carried a lot of reminiscences of the past. Never letting him rest, but never quenching his thirst either.

He stared past the kafila, and tried to envision his life farther.
>>>
The Desert

The Desert loved its children. The Desert understood the nomadic life. The Desert followed its traditions. The Desert knew not reasons. The Desert knew only love. And the Desert alone recognized, what the desert woman had. 

For, as it settled its gravel, at 'the moment', amongst 'the desert men', at 'the kafila', under 'the stars' burning bright, on the dark skin of one 'desert damsel', causing it to shimmer even more at night, and cast its glances at 'the fair Arab', willing the youth reach its summit of existence, and dissolve the truth that lay in the sand, into their being...

Simple it should have been..and yet..
Clear it must have been...and yet...
He should have seen...and yet...
The Desert roared...
And yet..he wouldn't...

So, the Desert cast one furtive glance at the woman, who stood watching...just before it settled.. she hadn't moved.. 

Through those few eternal moments, it kept watching her. All it needed was just a nod, all it needed was a slight expression, one sigh, one look, one call, it was her moment, nothing could have stopped it from granting her wish...but for her silence..

And her silence, settled it...

She hadn't moved, when she could have moved the world. She hadn't moved when she could have.. 
She didn't move the time, instead she let it settle..
She didn't move the wind.. to change the direction..
She didn't move the water, which could have revoked..
She didn't move the stars, burning down on her..
She didn't let her heart beat, didn't care if it stopped..
Her decision was made, as she stood watching, her Arab..
She didn't will the Desert.. to taketh over..

She had stood there...moved by love. And The Desert understood for it was...her silence. The Desert winced..but willed her along..

The wind died.. the Arab slept peacefully that night.
>>> 
For she knew the moment she set her eyes on him. She knew the moment, he stared back at her, past her. She knew he wouldn't...stay. 
And that her tale, would be his'. Instead of his', her's. 
She had waited for him to come. And now she awaits his leave...

Ah! Only the still Desert, whispered of her love!
>>>

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

बस एक मुस्कराहट…

आज जैसे मैंने लफ्ज़ खो दिए…लफ्ज़ कुछ लम्हों में खो दिए...उन लम्हों में जहाँ मैं तुम्हारे कुछ करीब खड़ी थी…वो करीब जो उन लम्हों में खो गया...


हल्की सी धूप थी. कुछ ठंडी सी हवा भी. तुम साथ थे. पर मैं बोहत दूर थी.


और करीब होते, तो मेरे दिल की धड़कन सुन जाती. 
और करीब आते, तो मेरे मन में दबे राज़ जान जाते. 
और करीब से देखते, तो मेरी आँखों में उम्मीद नज़र आ जाती..


मगर उम्मीद है, के तुमने कुछ नहीं सुना…
उम्मीद है, के तुमने कुछ नहीं जाना…
उम्मीद है, के तुम्हें कुछ नज़र नहीं आया...


मैं कुछ कहना तो नहीं चाहती...पर जाने से पहले...


जाने से पहले...कुछ देना चाहती हूँ… 


इन्ही गुमनाम लम्हों में से…तुम्हारे नाम...एक पल कैद करना चाहती हूँ… 


जाने तुमने देखा के नहीं.. पर एक पल था… हल्की सी धूप में,  हवा के चलते,  मैंने पल्कें उठा के.. इक बार मुस्कुराया था…


बस वही मुस्कराहट तुम्हें देना चाहती हूँ…


उसे मेरी कहानी समझ लो.. या यूँही कोई निशानी…
जहाँ भी जाना…
बस एक मुस्कराहट लेते जाना...
...

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

The Silence!

A silence
I recognize
Within me

Oh no its not silent on the inside
But only so on the outside

It tells me a lot of stories
Of feelings that stir
Often momentary
Often momentarily
Long drowned
Or at times
Long withdrawn

But the silence tells

Its this telling
That I write today

Its this telling
That tells me today

Just why
I spot a tear

Just why the world around me blurs
Ah…just a little

It speaks of secrets
That I make no secrets of

And eludes me
Of the obvious

Yet each moment
Keeps me with it

The silence
shows me pictures
of what am looking for
And
What I want be looked for…

The silence sounds me..
What I shall like it to speak
So that when I do speak
The underlying conversation
Of silence
Remains
Intact

My silence is dreamy
Yet
It’s the reality that wakes me
to it

At times a tear
At times a smile
The silence speaks to me
Causing both
Dissolving both

And my day
Silences my dusk…

Monday, October 11, 2010

हाँ आज फिर…

...दिन में कुछ लम्हें चुरा कर .. छत पे अकेले कुछ गुनगुनाने चली गयी थी.

धूप काफी थी... साथ किसी सहेली को ले जाती तो खींच कर मुझे छाँव में ले जा खड़ा कर देती.. मगर तुम तो मुझे जानते ही हो...
वो हवा बह रही थी ना...बस मेरे लिए काफी था... बालों को सुलझाते-सुलझाते पता ही नहीं चला कब... आँखों के सामने एक महफ़िल सी सजने लगी... और कई चेहरे सामने आने लगे...

याद तो नहीं के मैंने कब बुलावा दिया.. पर आकर खामोश से खड़े हो गए वो... 
कुछ देर बाद समझ आया... की मेरे कुछ गीत सुन रहे थे वो... 

न जाने क्या गुनगुना रही थी मैं...मगर ऐसा लगा...
जैसे उनकी नज़रें तो मुझ पर गडी हुई थी...पर देखा उन्होंने सिर्फ तुम्हें.. 
सुर तो मेरे थे पर आवाज़ सिर्फ तुम्हारी... 
गीत मेरे, पर धुन तुम्हारी...

वो खामोश चेहरे..
उन लम्हों के चलते..
कभी गुम से हो चले...
तो कभी नम... 
और कुछ.. 
कभी साथ दे चले...

इससे ज्यादा तो मैं खुद नहीं जानती... मैंने आँखें बंद कर ली थी... 
मन कहीं गुम गया था... और पलकें आप में ह़ी चिपक गयीं थी... न जाने कहाँ से उस धूप में भी नमी उभर आई थी...
आज फिर... छत पर खड़े, धूप में और कुछ बहती हवा के बीच...कुछ गीत गुनगुनाये थे मैंने... सुर भी लग रहे थे... आवाज़ भी गूँज 
रही थी के... बस अचानक एक नाजायज़ लम्हे ने एक ख़याल जगा दिया...

के ये हवा बहते बहते.. तुम तक मेरी आवाज़ तो पोहंचाती होगी ना...? मेरे गीत तुम्हें सुना के तो जाती है ना? मेरी आवाज़ तुम तक बहती चली तो आती है ना...?

बस फिर आँख खुल गयी... मैं तो छत पर वहीँ खड़ी थी... पर न तुम थे... न वो चेहरे... न कोई सहेली... बस कुछ बहती हवा और धूप थी...
...